Relationships Through My Eyes

First of all, I hope everyone had a lovely New Year’s Eve – or Hogmanay, where I come from – and I really do wish you all the best for 2016, and a year that is filled with love, good health and happiness.

A new year brings new things; sometimes these are physical, like a journal to log all your thoughts in, or a cute dress that’s 50% off in the Christmas sales (one of the big pluses of the festive season coming to an end!). Some things can be ideas, visions of what people would like to happen in the New Year, or maybe new perspectives of things in their lives. I’ve been thinking about relationships, recently. Wait, it’s not what you think! I’m only 20 and I know I have loads of time to think about it, but I’ve always had a one track mind when it comes to relationships.

I’ve never been in a proper relationship, and being a singleton whilst watching others go into relationships, I’ve noticed a few things. For example, how as soon as you start to like someone in a way that is different than pure friendship, it starts to take over and you fall fast, until you get to that point where all you can think about is that one person. What are they doing right this second? Have they noticed that the selfie I posted today wearing blue eye shadow (because it’s their favourite colour)?

Another thing that I’ve noticed, is that after someone falls in love and somehow the relationship ends, the people involved feel shattered, like something has gone missing from their lives. Then the people feel so broken, that they are reluctant to start new relationships, which is totally understandable. Now you are probably thinking: if you’ve never been in a relationship and have never been in love, why are you writing a post about it? Well, that’s exactly the point. I think there are so many passages about love written by people who have been in love, it may be interesting to post something about love from someone who has never experienced it, as it may shed a different light onto the subject.

Even though I have never been in a relationship with an actual real life person, I’ve been in several relationships involving a celebrity, a few posters, several mobile phone wallpapers and even a name change on social media profiles. Yes, all these relationships have been one way, as celebrities have no idea about who I am. I’m also an expert in romantic comedies and chick flicks, whilst earning raised eyebrows from the males in my family. Ok, so this may not actually count as realistic experience in the whole relationship agenda, but it has given me a different outlook on love. Such as, I am 100% sure that I will not open my door to a potential partner holding roses any time soon. I mean it’s a lovely idea, but it’s totally unrealistic. I mean, we live in a generation where someone swipes right on a mobile phone app if they like a picture of a person they may have never met and want to date.

I’m not a killjoy at all, I totally understand that time is advancing, and there are new ways of meeting new people, which is totally ok. I guess that one of the many things about having Asperger’s, is that I don’t follow social cues very easily. As in, if I want to know how to flirt with someone, I can’t watch it done by others, learn from it, let the knowledge sink in, ready for me to use whenever I have my flirting hat on. I usually search it on Youtube and cringe when presenters use diagrams or use terms much cleverer than my average brain can cope with, which leaves me just as confused as before. However, hopefully, I will learn how to flirt in my own way, without making the other person question their sanity and throw darts at a picture of my face.

What I’m trying to say is that no matter how much I may wish there was, there is no rulebook when it comes to relationships. There isn’t a to-do list for a certain landmark in the relationship, or a dialogue to say when asking someone out on a date.

Hopefully, we will all find someone during our lives, who loves us just the way we are, and we love them back in that same way.

Sending you loads of well wishes for 2016.

Love, 

Emma x