It is more than okay to share and be open!

Hi everyone!

It has been far too long since I have written a blog post, and to be honest, I have missed it this time around. Whether it is writing blog posts, songs or poems, writing is a massive part of who I am. So, I thank you all for taking time out of your days to read my rants over the internet.

A lot has happened over the past few months, with one of the main achievements being that I have officially graduated from university! This, in particular, was a huge step for both my and my family, as 6 years ago, I left school with no qualifications due to the severity of my mental illnesses. I would have never thought I would survive my first full day of college in 2016, let alone actually achieve a degree!

However, the aftermath of leaving university is not what I thought it would be, and it has heavily impacted my mental health. My motivation and energy to do the things I love have deteriorated, and I am seeing my friends and family less than I would like. I miss being a stone's throw away from my friends, and I know that we are all busy trying to maintain and seek happiness within our own lives.

For a long time, I believed that concealing my true feelings to properly support the people I loved was the way to be the best person I could be for them, and for a while it worked. However, years of using this as my defence mechanism have slowly chipped away at the back of my mind, with the damage being hidden from my mind. But like all cracks, they soon give way and set the waters free, and that has finally happened to me this week.
Now, if I am going to be truly honest, I wasn't going to post this, because I thought that posting this would be selfish or boastful. Maybe in a way it is, but I don't think that voicing your struggles should be seen as a conceited or an attention-seeking notion. As a British citizen, it is quietly suggested that we maintain a "stiff-upper-lip" which basically means that we don't say what is going on in our lives and that we do not share our emotions. This, in my opinion, isn't just wrong, but it is toxic, as now many people believe that they are being ungrateful or selfish for asking for help and expressing how they feel.
Okay, so I guess people want attention at times, but then again, we are human and as humans, we do need a certain amount of attention. Of course, there are certain kinds of attention-seeking that can be perceived as positive or negative. For example, if I drew a fake vampire-bite on my arm with a year-old tube of tomato puree, and screamed like a banshee in the local high street to boycott sales of Twilight fanfiction just because I felt like it, might not be the greatest form of attention-seeking. (I mean, depending on why I’m boycotting fanfiction, but you know what I mean!)

But asking for help, or needing someone to talk to because you feel alone, sad or you just need someone to listen and talk you through your feelings? That should be encouraged, as this I feel is self-care. Sometimes we can not do everything on our own, and that isn’t a bad thing at all. We shouldn’t have to feel like we have to go through everything on our own, as not only is that impossible, but it is also unhealthy. My mother always used to say to my brother and I growing up, that “many hands make light work”. And she is right. Helping and supporting each other as a community is a symbol of compassion, and vulnerability should be a strength, not a weakness.
So long story short, basically I believe that sharing is caring and that we should encourage the people around us to truly open up about their feelings and/or ask for help, regardless of gender, age, occupation, sexuality, and the list goes on. There is so much pain, negativity and anger all around the world at the moment, and it is important that we all try and help ourselves and each other in the best way we can. I am no oracle or genius, and I do not intend to preach or tell anyone what to do in the slightest. But I guess I just hate the idea of anyone else going through what I have been going through lately. I promise, that everything will work out in the end.

If anyone is struggling at the moment and needs help, advice or support in any way, I will put links to some helpful organisations below that do great work in helping people in so many different ways. They all specialise in slightly different fields, and I hope they help you like they have helped myself and my family in the past.

CALM (male suicide prevention charity) –  https://www.thecalmzone.net/

Samaritans (24-hour counselling helpline) - https://www.samaritans.org/

MIND (mental health charity) –  https://www.mind.org.uk/

Heads Together (mental health charity by the British Royal Family) - https://www.headstogether.org.uk/

I Am Whole (campaign by the YMCA, preventing the negative stigma around mental health) - https://www.ymca.org.uk/i-am-whole

I send you all my best wishes and love, and I will post as soon as I can. (Hopefully not in the next century!)

Love,

E x